Paranoia
On the last weekend before the most contentious election in living memory, a lot of us are evidently suffering from a newly discovered psychological problem “Pre-Election Anxiety Disorder,” or PEAD. PEAD has been diagnosed by genuine doctors who have been trained to quickly identify and name anything that can be used as an excuse for bad behavior or not feeling good.
We’ve been flooded with accusations of potential election fraud as well as perfectly legal schemes to encourage or discourage voting. We’re all a bit anxious, but sometimes it borders on justifiable paranoia. After all, even paranoids have enemies, according to Henry Kissinger.
Even if we do everything by the book, can we be sure that our vote will be counted? Not here in Podunk County. An SG staffer reported this about an hour ago. He’s a self-described RINO– Republican in Name Only, on the voter rolls as a registered Republican but he says he hasn’t voted Republican in the last 20 years. Let’s call him Rino just to make it easier to relate his story.
Rino listened to a recorded message on his answering machine because caller ID said the call was from “Podunk County.” The message began “Please stand by for an important information about your absentee ballot.”
The message said that as of October 28th, his absentee ballot had not been received by the County. It went on to remind him of the deadlines and provided a phone number for him to call if he had any questions.
Rino immedately went into panic mode because he had dropped his ballot off in person at a designated drop-off location where the envelope had been signed by a guy in a uniform and placed in what looked like a ballot box. He had dropped the ballot off on October 22nd.
Rino called the number, and the phone was answered “Podunk County Republicans.” Rino was a little surprised, and asked why the party was deliberately misleading people into thinking it was a message from the County. He was told that it wasn’t “their” fault if caller ID only showed Podunk County, and besides the message told him to call the Podunk County Republicans so why was he confused? Rino accepted that but later played the message again and there was absolutely no mention of the Republicans or anything to indicate in any way that the call had not originated from the County.
But that was later…
The volunteer who answered the phone told Rino that the party received a printout from the Podunk County Clerk’s office, listing all absentee ballots that had been sent out, and whether or not they had been returned as of midnight October 28. “But don’t worry,” she said, “there’s a big backlog and some of the ballots aren’t being logged in for up to 72 hours.” Rino told her that he had dropped his ballot off on the 22nd and she changed her tune substantially, telling him that he SHOULD be worried, and what he could do about it. Here are his options–
1. Call the county clerk’s office on Monday morning (she provided the number), but expect it to take an hour or more to get through. If he couldn’t get through, or if he did get through and they still said his ballot had not been received, he should either…
2. Go to one of the designated County offices and request a replacement ballot, or
3. Go to his precinct on Election Day and vote a provisional ballot. But the provisional ballot is for the Presidential election only; he will not be allowed to vote in the Senate, Congressional, and local elections, or the various referenda and “voter initiatives.”
Rino wondered if the report from the County showed only ballots that were received by mail, and was told “we don’t know– call the County on Monday.”
So Rino’s weekend is ruined, wondering whether his vote will be counted and foreseeing lots of ways that it might not be. Not to mention the prospect of wasting multiple hours on Monday trying to find out what’s going on and/or do something about it.
The more he thought about it, and the more he talked about it with the SG editor who is posting this, the more paranoid he became. What does he actually know? Here’s a summary of his thought processes:
He received a call that was identified as coming from Podunk County, but did not. The person he spoke to claimed to represent the Republican Party, but how could he be sure it wasn’t a Democratic voter-disinformation operation? Did they (whoever they were) really get a list from the County, or were they just calling everybody? Was it somebody trying to ensure that all of the County’s phone lines will be tied up on Monday so that legitimate problems can’t be solved (in other words, a Republican disinformation op)? Is there a conspiracy in the County offices??
SG’s advice– relax, enjoy the weekend, and if you feel the need, pursue it after the election. Through the courts if that’s what it takes. After all, you might actually have some enemies out there and you don’t want to play into their hands.
–SG
What do you think? Please enter a comment below.
November 2nd, 2004 at 2:55 pm
Rino reports that he called the county offices today and it took him almost an hour on hold before he was able to talk to a real person. He was told that his absentee ballot WAS received on October 23rd, the day after it was dropped off. He was also told that the party had bought the mailing list some time around the 15th! He says he WILL pursue this little irregularity, at least to the extent of a letter to the Electoral Commission, and he also says it’s time to join a different party.